ICLW!

Time is going by so quick.  Last night I was checking my email and was reminded of June's ICLW.

Already??

A little introduction.  My husband and I have been married for almost five years (July 12, giggity) and trying to get pregnant for four.  We went through 9 cycles of TI and Clomid before moving on to see a fertility specialist.

We then did three consecutive IUI cycles.  Everything looked great everytime. I was responding to the meds, sperm counts spectacular.  No baby.  Nada.  Zilch.  The only thing that was a little abnormal was my low estrogen levels.  Our doctor conferenced with us at the end of April and it was decided we would move on to IVF.

It's amazing what you once thought to be terrifying, really starts becoming your everyday life.  The injections, while I still dislike them, are a part of my routine.  Our first lab visit on Tuesday told us my estrogen levels were (again) lower than normal.  Our first ultrasound Thursday on Day 5 of stims showed two larger follicles, one on each side, but they don't start measuring them until they are 11 mm or larger.  Totally normal, the nurse reassured.  I was hoping for more follicles though.

The side effects sure tell a different story.  Two nights ago, I had a bad day at work, and came home crying.  Then I was fine until I was sitting downstairs with Chris talking about something or another, and whatever it was made me burst into tears.  So I cried, a lot.  Chris hugged me and told me it was just my added hormones and that he loved me.  Which in turn made me cry harder, which prompted a visit to Dairy Queen for a S'mores Blizzard.  I was in a better mood after that.

I am now starting to have some serious acne. I mean, the BCPs did a number on my chest, but now the acne is coming to my face.  I still get the "Lupron headaches," the ones that come suddenly like a dagger and go away after a few seconds.  I'm getting bloated.  My stomach looks like a pin cushion. 

I have no sex-drive.  None.  What.so.evah.  And I don't care.  I have no desire to have sex with him.  Of course now, when people see us, they are either going to look awkwardly at me, or sympathetically at Chris.   Which totally bites because we are ordered to stop sex in just a few days and we aren't supposed to do any dancing for almost a month.  Risa, a month ago would have whined and pranced around in lingerie.  Risa, now, says, "meh." Who cares?  Not this girl.  Besides, how sexy can it be right now?

Chris: "You're so hot.  I want you."

Me: "Ok I guess, but be careful of my stomach, it still hurts from the shot."

Chris: "I can't wait to get you naked."

Me: "Uh huh.  Hey do you think Pizza Hut delivers this late?"

Chris: "What?"

Me: "Never mind.  Use some lubricant this time.  The hormones make me too dry 'down there.'"

Chris: "Ok, anything you say.  You are such a good kisser."

Me: "Ow! You're on my ovary! Get off me!"

Tomorrow morning we go in for another U/S and hopefully see some more growth.

What about you? Where is everybody at this month?  


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